Friday, July 08, 2005

Official false alarm #2

So it turns out I just pee my pants. That's what they might as well of said. It's soooo annoying because that is exactly what I told Bryan I thought it was because it seemed to happen mostly when sleeping when my bladder is the most full and I try to hold it in. Because if I can hold it for even 5 minutes longer, going 35 minutes between peeing is soooo much better than going every 30 minutes.

I'm so irritated. I woke up at 5 am to a trickle, got totally paranoid, did some research and came to my own conclusion that it was probably urine. I went back to bed confident and when I woke up again I was paranoid all over again. I called my doctor and they told me to go to the hospital and I told them I didn't want to because I knew it was nothing. I just wanted to be able to explain my deal to someone and have them give me some reassurance. Instead I was told to go just incase and when I pleaded my case I was eventually told to "use my best judgment." At that time, staying home, waiting until Monday was my best judgment. But as the day wore on and everytime a little something leaked out it wore me down. And once I peed, and immediately after I still leaked and I think that is what put me over the edge. How can urine be leaking out immediately after I just emptied my bladder. So I called back and said "fine, you win, I'll go to the hospital but I know it's nothing." And it was nothing. I was 99% sure but it's that damn 1% of doubt that could be the only thing between nothing and something fatal. And IT'S ALL ON ME. I am literally the only one who can decide, should I let it go for 2 more days or just cover my ass? I figured it would be a very long weekend if I didn't get confirmation. Now I'll be able to sleep peacefully....in my own urine. Guess I should get working on some more Kegal exercises huh?!

I'm glad tonight wasn't the night. I left the house in shambles, I have my final to-do list for this weekend before the big day, my cleaners are coming Monday (the baby has to come home to a clean house, it will be his first and last time he sees it clean) and really I just wasn't in the mood to have a baby today. But can I tell you how happy I am that I'm being induced Monday??? I just want this to be over!

And really, I didn't care for the staff much tonight. The first pair that checked me out, one was a trainee and I HATE having the trainee/med students. I hate the lack of confidence they display, their clumsiness and it's just annoying to me. I know they have to do it but just not with me. And the other lady I could have slapped. She asked me if I was dilated at my last appointment so I told her the deal about the dr. having to open my cervix and I sarcastically said "sounds like fun." And she was very clear and very determined to make sure I knew it wasn't fun. NO SHIT. And she said that I need to ask if he'll be doing that before or after my epidural. Hahaha, isn't she funny?! People are so wise. Do you really think that I would honestly believe that someone forcing my cervix open would be painless? What is the benefit in telling me it's going to be hell? Sounds a little obvious and unprofessional to me.

The next duo that checked me was a midwife and nurse who did my speculum exam. Yeah the things us women get yearly but let me tell you it's a lot more uncomfortable when your pregnant. Anyway the midwife had to go into the "ohhhh, what is this on your leg? (referring to my tattoo) Does it symbolize anything?" Yeah it symbolizes that I fucking will kill anyone who asks me about my tattoos, especially, ESPECIALLY when my legs are spread eagle. And then nurse lady had to mention how she refuses to let her 19 year old daughter get one. Why? Because I guess that would make her LIKE THE GARBAGE THAT I AM. Here's a tip, if you are in the medical field, tattoo discussions of any kind should be off limits when in the presence of a tattooed person. I don't care if you wanted one, I don't care if you have one, I don't care if blah blah blah fucking blah. I DON'T CARE AT THAT MOMENT.

Maybe I'm a little overly bitchy at the moment because I found out I need a diaper. Or maybe because all this fun is interfering with my dinner time. Either way I am glad to be home and sooo looking forward to Monday.

8 Comments:

Blogger Amy said...

Yikes! I'm so sorry you had to endure such a hassle! My sis was in St. Joe's last night.. she said she felt kinda dumb 'cause it was for "no reason."( ie: the girl was contracting more than 8 times an hour for 4 hours.. @ 32 weeks. I hardly think that is nothing) My point is: Better safe than sorry. Nothin' better to pee your pants than give birth on 83 because you thought it was a false alarm. :) ohh I asked you about your tattoos... do you wanna kill me?! I'm such a dork.

7:08 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

I can't believe they talked about your tatoos like that.
What ever you do, don't sneeze. lol you think a trickle is bad, a sneeze is worse. I know, Ive done it.

9:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Cara? If it makes you feel any better I will tell you my story, but I'll make it quick. With #3, I woke up to a rather large "gush" of fluid. I didn't really know what to think of it so I went back to bed only to be awakened by another small "gush" of fluid. At noon I went into see my midwife who tested me and told me that my water had *not* broken. But actually it had (we confirmed this at the actual delivery some 19 hours later). I'm actually kind of glad that she didn't think it had broken as I didn't want any intervention. But OTOH, knowing that I can kinda close to endangering my baby (what if she hadn't come in 24 hours or less?), was scary to me. So it's good that you went in to be checked. You might actually have a slow leak & it's undetectable. Don't let all of this get you down. It's better to be safe than sorry.

Was that brief? Probably not. LOL, sorry.

10:08 PM  
Blogger Elaine said...

OK, leaking urine is TOTALLY normal, you big nut. It happens all the time. I was "damp" the whole last week or so. And, if your water was leaking, it's no big deal as long as people keep their hands out of there. Your body will just keep making fluid and as long as stuff is only coming out, no worry about infection (although hospitals get all wiggy about that).

You are doing so FABULOUS, girl. We are proud of you and just waiting for that babe of yours to come home to a clean house.

11:42 PM  
Blogger Andrea said...

I can't even tell the numbr of times I thought my water had broken when really I peed my pants!
I had a dumbass resident come rushing in my room with ultrasound equipment b/c, and I quote, "I am fairly certain your baby is crashing". Oh fairly certain, huh? Nice - I spent the next 18 hours in total fear that something was wrong (oh for the record - babies heart beats slow down when they are sleeping! Nice hostpial staff!)
So close now!

6:30 AM  
Blogger Lisa @ Heaven Sent said...

Well, I don't have any stories to share (yet!), but I can tell you that I would have done the SAME EXACT thing. Better safe than sorry!!

You are doing great, Cara. (Thanks for going first!) This will all be worth it come Monday when you are holding that beautiful little boy!
xoxoxoxoxo
Lisa

8:40 AM  
Blogger Brandi1977 said...

It;s better to be safe then sorry sweetie...you going to get checked out was the right thing to do!
Don't worry. After I had J if I had to go and didn't get to the bathroom ASAP I would damn near piss myself. I could not hold it at all after I had her.

9:02 AM  
Blogger Mama C-ta said...

Haha, funny how I feel so much better knowing so many other women out there pee themselves too :) Thanks everyone!

And Hame - there is a difference between them asking me about my tattoos and you. 1. I like you and 2. My labia weren't on display and flapping in the wind as you asked me!

12:53 PM  

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